Forgiveness is a journey. It requires time, grieving, and desire. Forgiveness requires hope. There is an element of pain, of sadness, of hurt, but there is so much joy, so much peace, so much love, so much beauty, so much surrender…and in my experience the way to find forgiveness is to surrender the pain to something outside of yourself (beyond your pain, your hurt, and your disappointment), to release it, to let go, to free yourself. It is something so simple at its core and yet so very challenging in practice, because to truly forgive you have to let go, 100% and you have to trust that you will be able to knit yourself back together again without those old threads of anger, disappointment, and pain.
One cannot forgive fully if one holds onto the hurt. One has to trust, to know that in your heart, it is possible to retain the lessons received without attachment to the suffering and pain.
We often associate forgiveness with others even though we tend to hold anger or disappointment towards ourselves, because we let x, y, or z happen. We weren't smart enough to catch the signs. We weren't strong enough to walk away. We should have done things differently.
When I started working with forgiveness of others in order to release old pain and heal old wounds, I often found myself slipping up from my intended words, and rather than saying "I forgive you" in meditation, I would (in hindsight - not so accidentally) say "I forgive me." This overwhelming wave of relief would wash over me, and in those moments....I realized that the person that needed the most forgiveness was me.
When was the last time your forgave yourself?
Orca Agate is a crystal often known as the stone of forgiveness. It supports deep emotional healing and allows us to feel supported as we embrace the areas of ourselves that need forgiveness most. A few free form pieces will be available at our next live instagram sale on Sunday, April 24th at 11am PDT.